Lately

Happy Friday!!  I wanted to just take a moment to acknowledge and thank some new followers lately for joining me on my journey!  I know it's not about the numbers AT ALL but there's something reassuring about new followers because it makes you feel a little bit better about yourself and like you're doing something "right".  My blogging really is an escape for me... something I love doing... and something I'm still, and will probably always be, finding my way through.   

I want to share, but I don't want to over-share.  I want people to know me, but I don't want to sit around talking about myself all the time.  So, it's a delicate balance and I've really relied on other bloggers lately to help guide me.  The biggest advice I get as a blogger, from other bloggers and professional women, is to just be myself and let my personality show.  Every blogger is different but we all have a similar goal: to inspire others in some way.

Today, I though I'd share to a few changes I've made in my life lately.  Maybe it will inspire you to make one (or more) changes.  I think this will be a good way for me to acknowledge some improvements (go me!) but also share just a little bit about where I am right now, and where I'm hoping (and planning and working) to go.  So this may seem like a totally random post but I kind of like that :-)  Please let me know what you think in the comments below!

1. I quit drinking soda: Ok if you know me very well at all, your jaw may have just hit the floor... I know, I understand... wait, what?  The Coca-Cola addict QUIT SODA?  Yes I did.  And I'm SUPER proud of myself.  Commence tooting my own horn!  Y'all, I have been addicted to original Coke my entire life.  And I don't just mean oh I like it... I mean ADDICTED.  I would crave coke like no other.  I had to have it every day and if afternoon rolled around and I hadn't had at least one, I would spend time and money seeking it out.  At one point I was drinking at least 3 cans per day.  Years ago when I worked in an office, I actually started having weird episodes where I felt like my heartbeat was irregular.  I had never had that before and it scared the crap out of me.  After a trip to the doctor and an EKG, I was told I was healthy and that I honestly probably just drank way too much caffeine.  I drink coffee in the mornings and I would have coke throughout the day... so I cut back on the coca-cola and eventually noticed my symptoms went away.  I did not, however, actually quit drinking soda. 

Years passed and I basically got my addiction back and was right back where I started.  I knew how bad it was for me, but I guess I just didn't let it sink in.  Before my wedding last year, we took some engagement photos in a super popular place for photos where people write with chalk on metal doors.  All the doors were covered and we were trying to erase some of the writing so it wouldn't be in our pictures.  I will always remember, quit vividly, when my husband-to-be grabbed a coke and dumped it on a rag and started wiping the chalk off the wall.  The coke, of course, dissolved it right away and started erasing the chalk that we previously couldn't budge.  THIS. WAS. HUGE.  I knew Coca-Cola was acidic... I KNEW that.  But sometimes it really takes a visual.  Did I quit then..?  No.  Sadly I wasn't that disciplined but I can acknowledge that as a turning point.  I finally got it and I needed to quit.

So this year for Lent, I decided to not only give up Coke, but also stop drinking soda completely.  I'm Lutheran and it's not exactly a Lutheran tradition to give up something for Lent, but there's been a few years that I've decided to do it.  So this year I committed and actually did it.  I haven't had a coke, or any soda, since.  Some of the changes I've seen in myself?  I'm craving WAY more milk.  I didn't think that was possible (my husband jokes about my massive dairy intake already) but yeah, where I used to crave coke with meals, I know crave milk most of the time.  I'm also just drinking more water which is a huge plus because I'm not great at making sure I get what I need.  Secondly, I've noticed an improvement in my skin.  Perhaps this is simply because I'm drinking more water or maybe it does have to do with less sugar in my diet now (and whatever else is in sodas yikes!)... I don't know, maybe it's both.  That doesn't mean I don't have my hormonal breakouts; I do.  Just in general, I don't feel like I've had as many problems lately.  Third, I feel like my energy is more evenly spread throughout the day.  Instead of sugar spikes and crashes, I feel more balanced.  Lastly, and this goes along with the increased milk intake... I am hungry all the time!!  Now, this isn't really anything new.  I have a ridiculous metabolism and I eat constantly but I'm even more hungry lately.  Best thing about it though is that I do crave some healthier snacks like fruit and nuts and salads (I'm back on a baby spinach kick lately).  Overall, I can really tell a difference (just like everyone says) and I pray that I stay strong and stay away from sodas forever now!

2. Healthier Eating:  I won't even try to call myself a healthy eater because I don't think I am.  I am however the queen of portion control... for real y'all.  That's the number one questions I get asked... "How are you SO skinny?!"  Truthfully, it's a little annoying and even more truthfully, I don't think anyone should be looking for health advice from me LOL let's be real.  So I feel a little weird when someone asks me what I do... because I eat what I want, I just don't eat a ton of it.  And that works for me in maintaining my weight.  However, now that I'm in my 30s, I can tell it's just not good enough to portion control.  I've gone a little nuts lately with trying to educate myself on better eating.  It's pretty impossible to avoid a discussion about ingredients and preservatives and additives, etc nowadays... and I'm thankful for that.  I haven't known jack about what I've been eating my entire life and now that awareness is up, I'm sort of disgusted with the things I eat.  I'm slowly changing my shopping habits and have switched from grocery shopping at Target on a regular basis, to shopping at Trader Joes on a regular basis.  This means me driving way further for groceries and definitely having a smaller store selection, but I'm making progress.  I decided to also start sucking it up and paying a little extra for organic foods when I can.  I was scared Trader Joe's would really cut into our budget, but guess what?  I honestly think I spend less there than I did at Target!  I plan on doing a receipt comparison in the near future (stay tuned!)... because I have not noticed much of a difference.  I do, however, notice a difference in the foods and other products (like laundry detergent)... simple, limited ingredients and really great tasting foods.  I'm still learning to transition, and it's not like I never go to Target or any other store, but I've noticed an increased desire within me to be overall healthy.  I think when you start with one thing, it starts to snowball.  For a really long time I feel like I've almost avoided making any changes at all because it seems futile... like how will this one little change help?  But it does... it gets the ball rolling.  One trip to Trader Joe's to "check it out" and see what they had has turned me onto my new favorite store and way healthier (and tastier!) meals for me and the hubby.  I also haven't bought any clothes at Target in months... hmmm imagine just buying groceries on your grocery shopping trips!  What a concept! ;-)

3. Getting up before the sun:  Let me just start this one out by saying that when I was in college, my roommates used to fight over who would have to wake me up from my naps... because that's how grumpy I am when I first wake up.  I have never been a morning person, ever!  Even when I was younger and I played competitive soccer and there were weekends that we would have to get up at 5am to leave the house to drive across Houston for a tournament, I was the kid sleeping in the car until we arrived at the game.  I have always slept in, I have always been a night owl... and I've always just settled on the fact that that's how I am.  Well, truth be told, you can make yourself whatever type of person you want, you just have to commit.  For me, it usually takes something greater than myself for me to make a change and that's why I am finally up before the sun nowadays.  For the first year of Chris and I being married, we'd fumble through our opposite schedule days where I'd be up late and he'd try desperately to stay up and spend time with me, and then he'd have to get up at 5am for work the next day... which meant that he'd have to nap the next afternoon, while I sat around feeling bad that he "didn't want to hang out with me".  It was a mess and it created a lot of fights and hurt feelings.  

Finally one day, it hit me.  Cassie, YOU are the one that has to adapt.  I have been stubborn for years and that "desire" within me to be one of those happy peppy productive people just wasn't enough.  It took actual fighting to get me to change.  Nothing will change until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of change.  So I committed to Chris that I would start getting up in the mornings with him and go to bed earlier at night.  Our new routine has us getting up at 5am to watch I Love Lucy and sip our coffee together.  We also added in a daily bible verse reading every morning... so instead of me reading that by myself before I go to bed at night, we now read it together, before we start our day.  It has made a huge difference for both of us.  We're not perfect and there are still days we decide to sleep an extra 30 minutes and forgo the coffee sipping time, but overall I can tell what a difference getting up early has made for me.  I feel happier;  I feel more productive and more "part of this world"... I guess that probably sounds weird, but when you work for yourself and set your own schedule, it's not always the easiest to make yourself available during the 9-5.  I was a little bitter about it at first... "but I don't have a 9-5 job, why should I get up so early?"... and short answer is because I needed to grow up and just realize my day works better when I'm up earlier, not in the middle of the night.  I also feel like I have more me-time and more quiet, meditation time.  The mornings with my coffee and my social media are priceless to me.  The number of gorgeous sunrises I've witnessed lately.  The mornings where I can walk around downtown Fort Worth before the hustle and bustle of the day begin... these things have made me SO happy lately that I'm mad at myself for not making myself into a "morning person" earlier.

 Ok so these are probably the biggest, most significant changes I've made lately that have really impacted me.  I didn't really plan on writing so much but I think it only makes sense to explain them in great detail.  Moving on to a few more changes that are a little more fun :-)  And shorter, I promise ;-)

4. I'm on Snapchat: Ok I'm always late to the party... mostly because I know my own social media addictions and I usually avoid downloading a new app until I feel like I have to have it... well, I'm now obsessed with Snapchat!  I think it is so cool seeing behind the scenes and into the personal lives of people that I follow.  I love hearing other people talk and laugh, instead of just looking at pictures of them.  On the reverse, I have total anxiety over what my voice sounds like recorded LOL so I haven't done a lot of video with talking, but it'll come eventually.  I share a lot about my cats (all 3 of them) and dog, Mr. Wilbur (get over it, I'm a cat lady... ok and a dog lady... I'm obsessed with my animals), but I also share stuff about me, Fort Worth, and behind the scenes fashion awesomeness.  So follow me and comment below with your snapchat so we can get to know each other! (My username is TX.Sass)

5. Hair: I am currently in the middle of a huge struggle on what to do with my hair: to cut or not to cut, that is the question.  I have been planning, for months, to chop it off because I just. can't. take. it. anymore!! Furthermore, I've wanted to cut and donate my hair for a really long time.  I am blessed with amazing hair.  That's not me trying to brag, I'm just being straight.  I get the most compliments on my hair... more than anything else I do or wear and more than any other physical feature.  I have ridiculously thick, straight, LONG hair and most people are jealous of it, I've been told.  What most people don't think about is how awful it is to maintain.  I have headaches on a daily basis because of how heavy it is.  I usually wear it up in my poof, because frankly it's hot and annoying LOL.  Try sitting on your hair all the time or constantly having to move it every time you throw your purse over your shoulder.  It's annoying.  Not to mention how long it takes to shampoo, and dry, and style.  I mean, I have never had a whole lot of patience for that which is why my hair looks the same a lot.  So I've been talking about chopping it into a lobb (long bob if you're not familiar) and donating my hair, then growing it out again.  It's sort of the reason that I've let it get this long.  And now that it is this long, I'm having a horrible inner battle with what to do.  My husband, of course, loves my hair and doesn't want me to touch it.  He's constantly reminding me of how many women he hears talk about how gorgeous my hair is and how they wish they had it.  All I really have to say to that is... Grass is always greener yo!  But the more compliments I receive, the more I doubt the cut.  Not because I just want to be showered with compliments... but because it's making me feel like I'm not appreciating something that I should be appreciating.  No one's trying to make me feel bad about cutting it, but that's what is happening.  But then there's the opposite, and the real reason I have always wanted to donate my hair... if I get so many compliments and I've been blessed with gorgeous hair, why am I not sharing that with someone less fortunate?  My brother went through cancer and lost his hair... I've seen it firsthand and know how it can affect people.  I want to make someone feel better about themselves.  But every time I'm set to chop, I start hearing those compliments again and those "oh my gosh, don't cut it!" comments.  *SIGH* If you have any advice or input, I'd love to hear it in the comments below!  As for now, I think I am going to trim and keep the length.  Perhaps in the middle of the summer when I'm sweating my balls off, I'll finally freak out and cut it.  We'll see...

6. Spring Cleaning: I am border-line hoarder even though I don't mean to be.  I have just grown up in a very thrifty environment where I was taught that everything can always be of use later.  You know, the whole "as soon as you throw it away you'll need it" idea.  Well, I think I've finally hit my limit and I've been having freak out sessions lately where I just want to get rid of everything!!  I am currently in the middle of a process that is clearly going to take weeks... spring cleaning.  I'm bad about giving up clothes because everything always comes back in style and my size has been relatively the same since high school so it's not like I just don't fit into old stuff... I do... which is the problem.  So lately I'm teaching myself to truly evaluate if I'm keeping something because I love it or because I'm afraid to get rid of it.  I'm slowly weeding out clothes and plan to sell some to Uptown Cheapskate.  Anything that doesn't sell I always donate to Berry Good Buys which benefits Safe Haven Tarrant County

Ok so this may seem like a rambling post (I hope not) but hopefully it helps you know me a little better and what my priorities are lately.  No day in my life is ever the same and I love that.  As I've transitioned into my 30s, I've realized that improving myself is the best way I can be spending my time.  You get to a point of just plain not caring about small stuff or what people think about you; you get to a point of knowing that you have to do for YOU, for your family and friends and that's it.  I'm not making these changes to impress anyone, I'm making them for myself and my marriage (and future children hopefully!).  I just hope that sharing the changes will perhaps spark something in you.  I am probably the most stubborn, anti-change person you know but I made a DECISION.  If you make a decision, I'd love to hear about it!!  What changes have you made recently?  Did I inspire you with any of my changes?  

Another change I plan on making..?  Posting more often.  I get really wrapped up in the details and planning out the perfect post (total perfectionist) instead of just writing and feeling and sharing.  So that's what I tried to do today.  Is it boring without pictures?  Are you wondering where the outfit of the day is?  Or did you enjoy reading this?  Or do you not care AT ALL what I'm doing in my personal life? LOL  I really do want to know.  But please be kind ;-)

Hope y'all have a very blessed Friday and amazing weekend!  Especially to all the mothers out there!  And once again, to anyone that's new to my blog, new to my instagram or twitter... thank you for following and I hope to get to know each one of you!  Until later y'all ...